6. the slough. rehearsal.

There were two of them. The first one in Alaksandrauski square, the second one in Sendai square. 

I swore an oath to squeeze out as many words as possible and to break the panic in front of people, and I swore to look into the eyes of anyone who would look into mine. As I was pouring with lead, my eyelids and forehead leaned toward the source of gravity. Day after day, my practices ended with almost no result. But I wasn't collecting junk. Practicing my skills, I feltmore and more insolence inside that I could not really tame. I was the devil himself, galloping in his mind on flames, seeking to destroy all on his path. There, where no one dared to extinguish fire. Everything needed killing and got it in the look of my eyes. Gradually. Just one eyes I could not conquer, destroy, reconsider. Ilya was not just an opponent. He carefully studied each of my grimaces and weighed the words on the tiny scales of his subjective values, I did not dare to attack. Going straight ahead did not work, too. It was impossible to make a decisive exhalation before the battle, because even this exhalation would not have been left without the attention of the all-seeing eye. And the attack was drowned in the first moments of collision, the eyes eagerly desired to keep the company of cockroaches in the deep crevices, an embarrassing white liquid of my wetness mixed with defeat dribbled down from my crotch. 

The first one. No big deal. Stupid spiteful phrases going out of my clenched teeth. He doesn't think that this is so. I catch moments when I can look at him, see in profile. Sometimes he catches my gaze. All of this can not exist. Someone's talking about our page on social network. It's called an amputated arm. "I can't. I don't have Internet... Until what? Until the eighth of September", I answered, while he was carefully digging into the frequency of my voice. We got to the subway with the others. I felt myself unwanted and free, stepping up to the stop. My feet got somewhat bogged down back then, slightly moistening my fingers.